Contentment is something that we’d all like to have. It comes in many different shapes and sizes, I guess. One of the areas we go looking for contentment in is the whole boy/girl, man/woman relationship thing. Problem is, a whole bunch of people go looking in the wrong places with disastrous consequences.

Back in the days when I was studying at Bible College – a good many years ago now – the principal of the College was a man by the name of Barry Chant. And I remember quite distinctly one morning, he came down to the common area where we all gathered before lectures and announced that “today” was exactly 50 years since he’d started following Jesus.

Fifty years! And the more I came to know him, as a teacher, a colleague ultimately and as a trusted counsellor and friend, I realised how much his life had been impacted by 50 years of walking with the Lord. The man has a maturity and wisdom that is quite remarkable.

I say that as a preface – because I’m about to share with you something today that he shared with me all those years ago. We were studying, in our various streams of academia, to become ministers of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. And I recall one lecture, where he talked about the three things that generally bring ministers unstuck.

They’re really easy to remember, because they all start with “g”. Would you like to know what they are? Girls, Gold and Glory. Pretty simple. Pretty powerful. And the more I think about it, those are the very same things that bring us unstuck in our search for contentment.

Girls – or in the case of women, guys – Gold and Glory.

Want to kick off with the first one of those today – because unless we get the girls/guys thing under control, then we’re not going to be content. And the whole subject of the boy/girl, man/woman relationships and intimacy thing … isn’t an easy one to talk about in this day and age, without sounding a bit anachronistic. Because attitudes and lifestyles have changed.

These days, intimacy before marriage and indeed outside of marriage is pretty much accepted in most societies as a fact of life. I think the current term is friends with benefits – where people engage in casual sex to meet their physical needs, without the emotional entanglement of an exclusive boy/girl relationship. And most couples who get married today, have slept together before getting married.

I heard a statistic the other day that fully 30% of married Australian men have visited a prostitute. Not to mention the office affairs, unfaithfulness and marriage breakdowns arising out of those extra–marital affairs.

And as the world around us becomes more and more accepting of promiscuity as purely a lifestyle choice … I start to find myself wondering, Hang on a minute, is it ME that’s going crazy here? Am I the one who’s out of touch by believing that physical and sexual intimacy belongs in a marriage – in the completely exclusive, life–long relationship between one man and one woman?

Is the biblical position on this still tenable in this day and age?

Then I pinch myself and realise that what Jesus has to say is always as applicable today as it was back 2000 years ago, because truth – His Truth – is timeless. And this is what Jesus said, when the religious leaders of the day came to ask Him about divorce:

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery. ’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away; it is better for you to lose one of your members than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away; it is better for you to lose one of your members than for your whole body to go into hell.

 “It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce. ’ But I say to you that anyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of unchastity, causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery. (Matthew 5:27–32)

That seems pretty harsh doesn’t it. Pretty tough – rigid. If Jesus were alive today, they’d probably call Him an extreme conservative; a fundamentalist. But there’s a reason that Jesus takes this apparently hard line. And that reason is that God created us male and female, in order that those who so choose, can live in a life–long intimate marriage as husband and wife. Plain and simple. Again – here is what He said, quoting this time the first book in the Bible, the book of Creation – Genesis:

Some Pharisees came to him, and to test him they asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause?” He answered, “Have you not read that the one who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” They said to him, “Why then did Moses command us to give a certificate of dismissal and to divorce her?” He said to them, “It was because you were so hard- hearted that Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for unchastity, and marries another commits adultery.” (Matthew 19:3–9)

The point is that we’re created to be husband and wife, and when we try to mess with that, when we try to break that – it doesn’t work. Our physiological drive to reproduce is a very strong one. Stronger in some than in others to be sure – but a strong one nevertheless. It’s a gift from God. And it’s a gift that is satisfied completely in the context of marriage as God had planned. You can’t be content chasing girls (or … guys as the case may be) outside marriage. It may seem fun and exciting and alluring at the time – but in the end, it leads to emptiness.

Sex without love is always empty. For me, there is no one, there can never be anyone, as beautiful as my wife. She’s mine and I’m hers – exclusively, no exceptions – and in that my friend there is such great contentment. So if you find your eye … or your heart wandering, remember this, if you wander, you will never ever, ever be content. Ever.

I know … I know – that completely flies in the face of contemporary beliefs and contemporary practice. It makes me look like a prude saying that sex outside marriage – in all its different forms – is wrong. Well it ain’t me – so please don’t shoot the messenger. It’s God.

God wants you and me to be content. Did you realise that? He places a high value indeed on contentment. On us being satisfied and fulfilled. 1 Tim 6:6 the Apostle Paul writes:

Of course there is great gain in godliness combined with contentment.

And therein lies the secret of God’s wisdom. Contentment and godliness go hand in glove. You can’t have the one without the other. God created us. He knows us better than we know ourselves and through Jesus, through His Word, He’s telling us how to be content, when it comes to our need to fulfil our male, female relationship. Now a little later in the week on the program I’m going to talk about singleness because not everyone gets married. And singleness isn’t a disease – it’s a place where many, many people find contentment.

But the one place that none of us will ever find contentment is chasing gratification out there, in a place where it will never satisfy. God knows what He’s talking about. Really He does. And we step over that line at our peril. He loves us – He loves you and He loves me and as any loving father would, He’s telling us this to protect us from ourselves.

A good friend of mine called Dave talks often about the economics of enough. When is enough, enough? For a lot of people, the answer to that is … never. And that attitude towards wealth and possessions ends up robbing them of their contentment.

They say that love makes the world go around, but so far as I can see, it seems to be money these days that makes the world go round – or at least, it certainly makes our economies tick over. In fact, it seems to me that economies, governments and people at large, ordinary punters like you and me – are addicted to conspicuous consumption to fuel our own personal growth in wealth and status and luxury and what other people think about us, not to mention fuelling the holy grail of a prosperous nation – economic growth.

I really don’t think we even begin to realise how addicted many of us are to overconsumption. The next thing. The next dress. The next car. The next house – each one bigger and better and shinier than the last one. Noam Chomsky – whom I know some people consider to be a rabid, left wing, critic – says something that really resonates with me, as I look, dispassionately, at the multi–trillion dollar advertising industry that bombards me constantly with the exhortation to spend up big. He says this:

All over the place, from the popular culture to the propaganda system, there is constant pressure to make people feel that they are helpless, that the only role they can have is to ratify decisions and to consume.

It’s pretty much true, isn’t it? Advertising puts its finger on our feelings of inadequacy in order to get us to purchase the thing that will make us feel adequate, even when the thing that they’re selling us may not be all that good for us.

Heart-healthy margarine – when in fact, it’s worse for us than it is good for us. Wrinkle cream – come on you women – which one of you can resist the advertising line look 10 years younger in just 14 days.

Analyse any advertisement – TV, radio, print, billboard and at its heart, it points out our sense of inadequacy and promises to deal with that problem, to make us content, if only we’ll part with our hard-earned cash. It’s true.

Now, am I saying that all consumption is bad? No. Am I saying that we should all be poor as church mice? No. But what I am saying is that in our yearning to feel satisfied, many people swallow the implicit lie that the advertising industry is telling them and they go looking for their satisfaction and contentment in wealth and the things that it can buy, only to spend a fortune to discover that they’re living a shallow life and that there is simply no contentment in wealth.

Well, let me save you some trouble. God’s known that for rather a long time, and He’s gone to the trouble of telling us over and over again. Here it is, through the words of one of God’s servants – King Solomon, who was one of the richest and wisest men who has ever walked planet Earth – Ecclesiastes 5:10,11:

The lover of money will not be satisfied with money; nor the lover of wealth, with gain. This also is vanity. When goods increase, those who eat them increase; and what gain has their owner but to see them with his eyes.

And as an experienced practitioner at trying to satisfy myself with wealth, I can tell you it’s absolutely true. Now I don’t know where you’re at, but I’m aware that many of the people listening to this today may not have a relationship with Jesus – so when I share the Bible with you, you’re thinking – yeah, so what? Fair enough. So let me share with you something that the great journalist Bernard Levin wrote – and here’s a man who is a professed atheist:

Countries like ours are full of people who have all they desire, and yet lead lives of quiet desperation – understanding nothing but the fact that there’s a hole inside and no matter how much food and drink we pour into it, however many motor cars and TVs we stuff it with, however, many well-balanced children and loyal friends we parade around the edges of it …. it aches.

So many people relate to that – paradox – the more we try to fill ourselves up, the emptier we feel. The more we consume, the less satisfied we are. So what are you consuming? What are you spending your money on? And how much does this desire to have, have its dark tentacles wrapped around your heart with a vice-like grip that’s robbing you of the contentment that God wants you to have?

I was talking to a man – a farmer – just before Christmas last year. And he was telling me how grieved he was at the consumerism that he was surrounded by at Christmas. He and his family had decided not to give one another Christmas presents anymore – because they all had what they needed, They decided to give to those in need, instead.

If there’s one thing that will rob us of contentment faster than just about anything else, it’s greed. And if there’s one thing that will set us free from that terrible malady faster than anything else, it’s generosity. Letting things go – giving to those who need more than we do. I was quite shocked actually, how prevalent is the exhortation in God’s Word to give generously. It’s something that God tells us to do over and over again, not because He’s in desperate need of our cash to fund His Work – although that is how God funds His work on this earth, through His people – but because He wants our hearts and He knows that our hearts are tethered to our wallets and the way He sets us free from the discontentment of putting our hopes and our trust and our desires in wealth, is by getting us to part with it in a sacrificial way. Have a listen – 2 Corinthians 9:6–8

The point is this: the one who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and the one who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. Each of you must give as you have made up your mind, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. And God is able to provide you with every blessing in abundance, so that by always having enough of everything, you may share abundantly in every good work.

God’s plan is to set us free so that we can be content.

The one thing that that farmer said to me that I think is going to stick with me for the rest of my life was this: he said – It gives me such joy to see other people get such great benefit out of what I am able to give – so much more joy than if I kept it for myself or if I gave presents to my friends and family that they don’t really need.

Bingo! He’s right on the money – if you’ll pardon the pun. There is a man whose heart is free from the love of money. There is a man who is set free from having to have the next thing, the next hit, the next short term high from buying this or that. And that’s what it’s like when you’re addicted to wealth – I speak here from first hand experience, because I very much used to be – it’s like a heroin addict looking for their next trick.

Do you think … do you really think you can be content with your life if you’re always looking for the next hit? The love of money is ruining many a life. 1 Timothy 6:10

For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil, and in their eagerness to be rich some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pains.

My friend, the love of money is going to tear you apart and I know that there are some people listening to this – perhaps you’re one of them – who are squirming just a little at the moment because you know that this Word from God is for you today. It’s exactly where you’re at.

If you are – you’ve just received God’s Word in the power of the Holy Spirit and He is able to do things in you and for you, to set you free from your addiction to wealth and to stuff – thing that I couldn’t ever do for you and things that you can’t possibly do for yourself.

All you have to do is ask Him.

How concerned are you about your reputation; about what other people think about you? For some, reputation is everything. They’re glory–seekers – and whilst on the outside, they look happy and successful, on the inside, the desire to be liked, the desire to look good, the desire to be thought well of, is killing them.

Have you ever seen one of those old Western movies, where the bad guy comes into the bar, and he starts to shoot at the feet of the good guy to make him jump and dance? And so the good guy is jumping and dancing to avoid being shot in the foot.

Depending on the scene, sometimes it’s funny, like in the final movie in the Back to the Future trilogy, and other times it can be quite serious and scary. But anyhow, it’s a motif that’s repeated over and over again in many a Western.

Now, just think about the guy who’s being shot at – the one who’s doing the jumping and the dancing. What do you imagine is going through his mind. Shock. Terror. Fear. The adrenalin is pumping to stop him from being hit by a bullet. The one thing that’s not going through his mind at that moment is peace and contentment. Obviously. It’s a bit difficult to be content when someone’s shooting at you isn’t it?

And yet that in a sense, is how many people are living their lives. Why? Because they’re so worried about what other people think. They’re concerned with their reputation. They’re worrying about what people are saying behind their backs. And all that comes from the fact that we want people to think well of us and speak well of us. We worry about our reputations – more often than we worry about whether or not we’re doing the right thing; whether or not our lives are honouring God.

I speak with some authority on this because I used to be really concerned with what people thought about me. Well, I can tell you, if that still bothered me, I wouldn’t be able to do what I’m doing now. Some guy’s put a video up on YouTube claiming I’m a heretic. As well as lots and lots of encouraging phone calls and letters and emails, I get the odd rude or disparaging one too. And if those things got to me I simply wouldn’t be able to keep going.

The miracle in my life, is that God transformed me from someone who tried to be everything to everyone – to someone who’s content with who I am and, probably more importantly, who I’m not. What I can do and what I can’t do. I like you have strengths and weaknesses, and I’ve come to grips with the fact that some things I just can’t do.

But it wasn’t always like that for me – and so when you’re trying to be everything to everyone, when you’re running around keeping up appearances – man that is seriously hard work. It’s exhausting. And it was only when I started feeling safe in Jesus, that I started caring less and less about what people thought. I’m me. I do my best. Often times I say things that God tells us through the Bible and that seems to be out of step with contemporary thinking. That’s it. Can’t be any more or less than I am.

The problem comes when our reputation is more important to us than our relationship with Jesus. The problem comes when we go looking for glory for us, and we forget that God doesn’t share His glory with any one. Which is precisely the point that Jesus made in a powerful way. Have a listen:

I can do nothing on my own. As I hear, I judge; and my judgment is just, because I seek to do not my own will but the will of him who sent me.

If I testify about myself, my testimony is not true. There is another who testifies on my behalf, and I know that his testimony to me is true. You sent messengers to John, and he testified to the truth. Not that I accept such human testimony, but I say these things so that you may be saved. He was a burning and shining lamp, and you were willing to rejoice for a while in his light. But I have a testimony greater than John’s. The works that the Father has given me to complete, the very works that I am doing, testify on my behalf that the Father has sent me. And the Father who sent me has himself testified on my behalf. You have never heard his voice or seen his form, and you do not have his word abiding in you, because you do not believe him whom he has sent.

You search the scriptures because you think that in them you have eternal life; and it is they that testify on my behalf. Yet you refuse to come to me to have life. I do not accept glory from human beings. But I know that you do not have the love of God in you. I have come in my Father’s name, and you do not accept me; if another comes in his own name, you will accept him. How can you believe when you accept glory from one another and do not seek the glory that comes from the one who alone is God. (Jn 5:30–47)

The point He’s making there is that He’s not here to build an empire; He’s not here to build himself an empire and to be waited on hand and foot. He’s not here to get more disciples than the other rabbis – although in the end that’s exactly what’s happened. Jesus came to do His father’s bidding. And when people – those people with whom He was speaking – don’t accept Him as the Son of God, He knows precisely why that is. He puts His finger right on the problem. Let me read it to you again – the last verse, verse 47, Jesus asks this question:

How can you believe when you accept glory from one another and do not seek the glory that comes from the one who alone is God.

Good question. The right question. IF people are seeking their own glory from one another, accolades, awards, pats on the back, compliments – it’s a sure sign that they’re more interested in their own glory than in God’s. A little later Jesus said to His disciples – The time has come for the son of Man to be glorified. Do you know what He was talking about? He was predicting His crucifixion. For Jesus, being glorified meant sacrificing everything for you and for me.

And now … now He sits in glory at the right hand of the father. One of the reasons that so many people aren’t content, is because they’re chasing the glory of men, the glory of their own reputations. And because people are fickle – you end up riding a roller coaster of public opinion. And that’s no way to find contentment is it. So long as you worry about your reputation and what other people think, you can never be content. Ever.

Jesus knew that. That’s why He said to them: I do not accept glory from human beings. Elsewhere, John records that:

Jesus on his part would not entrust himself to them, because he knew all people and needed no one to testify about anyone; for he himself knew what was in everyone. (John 2:24,25)

Who were the “them” that he didn’t entrust himself to? The crowds that were following him because they saw all the miracles He was performing. In other words, He didn’t get suckered in by all the people who were oohing and aahing at His miracles, because He knew that those were the very same ones that would soon be shouting “Crucify him.”

Yes, we have relationships. Yes, we trust those whom we love and our close friends. Yes, we listen to trusted advisors who come to us and tell us some hard things about ourselves from time to time. That’s as it should be.

But the fickle opinions of people who are serving their own needs, the completely valueless taunts and words of flattery that people who themselves don’t have a strong and decent character are not the yardsticks for our performance.

If we listen to them, then we’re no different to the cowboy dancing to the shots of the bad guy in the Western movies.

The only yardstick to measure who we are and whether we’re living a good life or not, is God and we find His yardstick, His measure in His Word the Bible. The beauty of that is that His Word is true. And when we fail, when we fall short, you and I – in Him we have forgiveness through the grace of Jesus Christ.

That’s where you find contentment. Nowhere else.

It’s a pretty normal thing – boy meets girl, they fall in love, they get married. But not everyone follows that path. Some people stay single all their lives. Others – find themselves “single again” through the death of their spouse, or through divorce. So – here’s the question. Can a single person be content with their life?

The last time we talked about marriage and family on the program I had a number of requests from single people to talk about singleness. So today, as we chat about contentment again, I thought that that would be a great thing to do.

Because there are some people who don’t want to be married; there are some people who were never meant to be married. I was having dinner just the other night with a bunch of my classmates from the Royal Military College Duntroon.

Now, we graduated over 30 years ago, as officers in the Australian army – so it’s been a while. One of the guys, Warren – a great bloke, salt of the earth – has never been married. He lives on a yacht on a marina and works at one of the large, free to air TV stations. Warren is a live wire – he always has been and always will be. Some would call him eccentric. He is totally content being who he is, being single and I doubt he will ever get married. Knowing him as I do, can I tell you, I think that’s the right thing for him.

No, I’m not saying that everyone who’s single is slightly eccentric. That’s just one example. But I think sometimes that the rest of us – the ones who are married – sometimes think that people who have never married and are never likely to marry are slightly odd. But that’s simply not the case.

Some people are meant to be married, others aren’t. That’s what Jesus actually said. Matthew 19:9–11

And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for unfaithfulness, and marries another commits adultery. So His disciples said to him, “If such is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry.” But he said to them, “Not everyone can accept this teaching, but only those to whom it is given.

And so to me, when it comes to contentment and the decision to be married or single, that seems to be the key. Some can accept the idea of being single. They like the idea of remaining single – and so it’s an awesome choice for them. As we’ll see in a moment, it frees them up to get focussed on God’s work without any restrictions or limitations. The rest of us need to see that as a perfectly valid choice.

Others – others like me, can’t accept that. I am not one to remain single. And so those people should seek out a wife or a husband as the case may be and get married. And again that’s exactly what the Apostle Paul says – expounding a bit on what Jesus said – 1 Corinthianns 7:1–9:

Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is well for a man not to touch a woman.” But because of cases of sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except perhaps by agreement for a set time, to devote yourselves to prayer, and then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self- control. This I say by way of concession, not of command. I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has a particular gift from God, one having one kind and another a different kind. To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is well for them to remain unmarried as I am. But if they are not practicing self- control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to be aflame with passion.

Some people might be surprised about the fact that the Bible is so direct about sexuality – but hey, our sexuality is a big part of who we are. And as we chatted about this the other day, we saw that God’s plan is not for us to fulfil our sexual needs in casual relationships. Sex is an amazing gift from God – it was, after all His idea – and so He knows that we are designed for physical intimacy to occur in an exclusive bond that we call marriage.

But not everyone has that need. Paul makes the point that he himself is single – I wish that all were as I myself am. Why – because as a single person we can very easily go and serve the Lord wherever He may call them. And that’s the key. Come back to it – God made me, and God made you. He chose one life for me, another for you. We are perfectly made to live the life that He’s chosen for us and that’s the life we should be living. The Apostle Paul again – 1 Corinthians 7:17

However that may be, let each of you lead the life that the Lord has assigned, to which God called you. This is my rule in all the churches.

I’ve been in churches where single people aren’t included in family BBQs – somehow they’re shunned. I’ve seen it – perhaps you’ve seen it too and those of you who are single have no doubt experienced it. I’ve experienced it from the receiving end. I was single and 36 years old – and often after church on Sundays a few families would get together to … I don’t know … go for a BBQ to someone’s house.

And they wouldn’t think to invite me along – because I was single. I didn’t have a family at the time. I can tell you that really hurts. Some churches have singles ministries – well, fair enough, but it’s almost as though we put the singles over in one corner and segregate them from the families.

When you think about it. It’s pretty crazy, because if there’s one thing a single person needs, it’s other people around them. So I say to those who are single, if you are content being single, stay single. Don’t ever be forced into a marriage by people’s expectations. Singleness isn’t a disease. It’s something that God chooses for some people and it can be an absolutely wonderful way to live your life.

And if you’re not content being single, then – as Jesus says, as the Apostle Paul says, for goodness sakes, get married so that you can be completely fulfilled. Do what God’s made you to do. Be who God’s made you to be.

One of the most difficult things is the situation though where someone finds themselves single again – either through the death of a loved one or through marriage breakdown and divorce. We don’t have time today to go into the single–again situation fully. But I promise that one day in the not too distant future we will do that.

But for the rest of us, we need to understand that those who were once married and now find themselves single again, need our special love and care and understanding and support. People who have been divorced have typically been through a painful and bloody separation. It hurts terribly when this special, God–anointed relationship which was meant to last a lifetime, is torn apart.

Is divorce a sin? Sure. But so are a lot of other things. Sin always hurts and a special compassion is required to love someone through that.

Those who have lost their husband or wife too, need our love and attention, particularly let me say the widows, for whom God has a very special heart. Psalm 68:5 says that the

Father of the fatherless and protector of widows is God in his holy habitation.

So, if you know someone who is single again – for whatever reason, there is an opportunity … a great opportunity to show the love and the mercy and the compassion of God. Because the transition from being married to being single is a tough one – as anyone who’s ever been through it will tell you.

And to all you singles out there – be content as you have so much time to spend with the Lord, to draw close to Him, to experience His Presence in a unique and beautiful way. Let Him be your all in all and cherish greatly your time with the Lord.

So you have this feeling of discontentment eating away at your heart. Try as you might, you just can’t shake it. How to rediscover the contentment you once felt? That’s the question. Well, it turns out that God has the answer.

You’ve had that experience right? Things are going along, okay but then something happens – at home, at work or maybe … maybe it’s just something going on in your heart, and that contentment you once had, evaporates.

Have you ever stubbed your toe? You know? Whack – you hit your big toe on a brick or something – ouch it hurts. The rest of your body is fine – your heads good, eyes, ears, mouth – tick. Arms and legs. Yep fine. Torso – nothing damaged or hurting there – it’s just this one little part of your body, your big toe that’s aching. And so, despite the fact that every other part of you is fine, all your attention goes to your throbbing toe. And your sense of wellbeing has just evaporated in an instant. All the other good things that were going on around you are forgotten as you focus on your aching toe.

Well, that’s so often how it is with our sense of contentment. You look around your life – the hilltops and the valleys, the nice sunny happy bits, and the not so sunny and happy bits – and your attention has this habit of focusing, fixating if you will, on the one thing that’s not going well in our lives.

You’ve done it, I’ve done it – it’s a really common thing that happens to us. If we weighed the whole of our lives, all the blessings that God’s given us, in the overall scheme of things we should be content, but you know …. It’s like the throbbing toe, We just can’t get our minds off it and that one thing robs us of our contentment.

It may be a bit of tension at work – a difficult boss, a peer who’s been undermining you. Perhaps one of your children is going through a difficult phase in your life, or your wife or husband isn’t everything you wished they were. Or maybe it’s something quite big – and you feel like it’s closing you in, like you’re in a dungeon? So – what’s the answer? How can you move from discontentment to contentment? Well, I’d like to take you into a dungeon to show you how Paul and Silus did it.

They’d healed a slave girl who had had a spirit of divination, and as a result, people weren’t too happy – the owners used to make money out of her, so ….

The crowd joined in attacking them, and the magistrates had them stripped of their clothing and ordered them to be beaten with rods. After they had given them a severe flogging, they threw them into prison and ordered the jailer to keep them securely. Following these instructions, he put them in the innermost cell and fastened their feet in the stocks.

About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the prisoners were listening to them. Suddenly there was an earthquake, so violent that the foundations of the prison were shaken; and immediately all the doors were opened and everyone’s chains were unfastened. When the jailer woke up and saw the prison doors wide open, he drew his sword and was about to kill himself, since he supposed that the prisoners had escaped. But Paul shouted in a loud voice, “Do not harm yourself, for we are all here.” The jailer called for lights, and rushing in, he fell down trembling before Paul and Silas. Then he brought them outside and said, “Sirs, what must I do to be saved?” They answered, “Believe on the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved, you and your household.” They spoke the word of the Lord to him and to all who were in his house. At the same hour of the night he took them and washed their wounds; then he and his entire family were baptized without delay. He brought them up into the house and set food before them; and he and his entire household rejoiced that he had become a believer in God (Acts 16:22–34)

So –Paul and Silas did the right thing, a crowd attacked them because no good deed ever goes unpunished, they’re arrested, given a sever flogging and thrown into prison. Into the innermost cell, with their feet in stocks. There you go! That’d be enough to rob you of your peace and contentment for the day wouldn’t it. I suspect that if you or I were in that prison cell, with our wounds aching, we’d be angry, hurt, afraid – asking God what the blazes was going on, even shaking our fists at him, right? That’d be the natural reaction. But Paul and Silas – around midnight we’re told were praying and singing hymns. PRAYING AND SINGING HYMNS!!!! Can you believe that? They were worshipping God. They were living through their misery with thankful hearts … and the rest is history. God came and busted them out of prison – there is such power in praise and thankfulness. When we rise above our circumstances and lift up our hearts and worship our Lord, He has the power to break us out of our prison of despair.

The rest, as they say is history. The jailer is saved, he cares for them, feeds them, his household is saved and the next morning, they’re released.

The single, most unnatural act when we’re in that dungeon is to praise God, to sing songs, to lift our hearts and our eyes and our hands heavenward to worship our God – but that’s exactly what we need to do. Because that act of worship is music to God’s ears. That act of worship from the heart, is how we connect with the Lord amidst our desperate circumstances. That act of worship is what so often triggers a powerful intervention from God, to change everything.

The number of times, in my life, when I’ve been sitting in my usual chair in my study, early in the morning, facing this issue or that, and I’ve just taken him at His word and started to worship Him and give Him thanks and praise Him – even though that’s the last thing I felt like doing – the number of times He’s come and broken me out of my prison cell of despair … well, I’ve simply lost count.

God shows up every time –and I get up and walk away from those encounters with a sense of joy and a sense of peace and a sense of contentment – despite my circumstances. To me, it’s like … like a miracle. How does God do that? I’m really not sure but He does. He does it again and again and again.

The way we move on from our discontentment is to worship the Lord. It’s that simple. Don’t believe me? Try it. It works.

It happened to Paul a second time, some years later, when He was in a Roman prison, chained to his guard awaiting a death sentence. Now this short passage from Philippians 4:6,7 is going to be familiar to many – but there are two words that I bet you’ve glossed over – as I did for many years. Two words that change everything!

Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus

Did you pick the two words I was talking about – “with thanksgiving” – that’s the key. How often do we go to the Lord with a problem and we grumble and complain, as though He’s some call centre operator who can fix the problem? I don’t know – but I imagine He must get sick of that stinking attitude from us over and over again.

His call is to go to Him with thanksgiving in our hearts and on our lips – with a sense of wonder and anticipation at what He’s going to do, with a sense of expectation over the good things that He’s going to do – and like any good dad, when He sees one of His children coming to Him with the right heart and the right attitude – an attitude of faith – He can’t help Himself. In His great and mighty heart filled with boundless love for us, He can’t help Himself. He has to act. He loves us. And just at the right time, He’ll bust us out of the prison of our discontent’ he’ll break the shackles that hold us – and set us free with joy and peace and contentment in our hearts.

He’s a wonderful God. He loves you so much. Go to Him with thanksgiving in your heart.